"Satirical" ESPN PreSeason MLB Power Rankings: Milwaukee 29th

[homer]

No this is not a mis print. Eric Neel has the Crew ranked 29th in his initial power rankings:

 

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=neel/080219

 

 

29. Milwaukee Brewers

Eric Gagne apologized to his Brewers teammates for the "distraction" he caused them. The ritual (see Paul Lo Duca earlier this week as well) of these vague, no-questions-asked pressers has become so standardized, so utterly without content, that it made no difference whatsoever that Gagne had only just reported to camp that day.

 

Am I missing the joke here? He also has Chicago Cubs ranked 26th.

[JoeHova]

It's clearly some kind of attempt at a joke. He has the Red Sox at 15. I guess he might just be trying to point out the absurdity of preseason rankings, but I'm not going to wade through that to try find out exactly what he had in mind.

[homer]

Yeah, it's got to be some kind of joke but you'd think there'd be some mention of that in his intro.

[razzzorsharp]

Funny Guy. Funny, funny, funny, guy.

[jordanmuehl]

This guy either has no idea what baseball is, or has no idea what satire is. Either way, ESPN might want to look elsewhere for a new writer of its Page 2 column.

[TheHappyYoungster]

Wow...I try not to take these things too personal. But, this guy has no clue.

 

Further proof that the internet is full of garbage. JUST SAY NO TO DRUGS!!

 

 

"Happy"

http://forum.brewerfan.net/images/smilies/smile.gif

[BrewCrewForever]

No way would the Red Sox be 15, Cubs be 25 and Brewers 29. Was this not supposed to be published till April 1 for fools day?

[sheetswannabe]

It must be a joke. White Sox 3rd? Reds 10th?

[sbrylski]

He must have drew teams out of a hat. Its not just the Brewers. Twins #5, Rangers #9, Royals #11...

 

Its gotta be a joke.

[pitchleague]

if it's on Page 2, it's a joke. End of story. EVERYTHING on that page is written satirical, for the most part.

 

I would agree that it's rankings to show you that rankings are meaningless in the pre-season.

 

I'll have to check it out later on just to see.

[SeriesFinale]

Of course it's a joke, how is anyone even questioning that?

 

Anyway, I think he makes a decent point, but the text of the article is still pretty dull.

[Ennder]

Jokes are usually funny which is what confused me. The point is also terrible if that is his point. Yeah you cannot predict the season perfectly but you can certainly do better than what he has listed.

 

Last year I participated in the Predictatron 2008 competition at Bpro.

 

I was off by the following amounts on W/L records

 

11 - 2 times (Col and Cle)

10 - 1 time (Sea)

8 - 1 time (Hou)

7 - 1 time (Was)

6 - 4 times

5 - 5 times

4 - 4 times

3 - 3 times

2 - 3 times

1 - 2 times

0 - 4 times (Mil!)

 

I'm far from the best at this (though I did finish in the top 10 and won a BPro subscription) and I was pretty darn close on 16 of 30 teams, relatively close on 9 others and only far off on 5 teams total.

[PlayerHader]

"Jokes are usually funny which is what confused me. "

 

I gaurantee the author would be laughing if he saw this thread.

[yoyo49]

It's ranking the teams based on their "cleanliness" in terms of substance abuse.

[pitchleague]

you should read some of the comments to the article on ESPN.com.

 

There are obviously many others that were not amused by it and/or didn't get it that it was a joke.

[yoyo49]

Nonetheless, it is a terrible article and that's why it is on Page2.

[Ennder]

It's ranking the teams based on their "cleanliness" in terms of substance abuse.

 

Then why is Oakland so low when they only have young guys now basically? Which Braves are accused of steroids to be in the bottom part? Why would the yankees be #6.

 

I dunno, I stand by the fact that it isn't funny, even the little blurbs he wrote aren't funny. I don't usually read ESPN so maybe that is just par for the course with them.

[dadofandrew]

ESPN used to be so good...it's just astounding how far they have fallen.

[nate82]

We know there are people who think it's too early to rank the teams about to begin the 2008 Major League Baseball season. One hundred and sixty-two games left to be played, they say. Everything still up for grabs, they insist.

But these are the same people who say B12 sounds like a plausible explanation, and LiLo's nudey New York Mag shoot looks like the beginning of a real turnaround.

These people are innocents.

We know better.

Obviously a joke. If you can't see it then I don't know what to say.

[TooLiveBrew]

Thread title should be updated to reflect the actual nature of the article... 'cleanliness' of teams re. PEDs

[Ennder]

Obviously a joke. If you can't see it then I don't know what to say.

 

Yes but it isn't funny, that is the point. Nothing about the article is actually clever or interesting and the rankings are absurd even when taken in the context of the joke. Just a very poorly written article overall. I mean if the point is really to order the teams based on drug use he even did a terrible job of that.

[JJHardy7]

Page 2 is only good when there are actually jokes backing up the stuff. I know I might be in the minority in liking Bill Simmons, but at least that guy knows sports and makes crazy/funny remarks. This clearly made no sense and it's more ESPN trying to branch out as a pure media entertainment outlet than anything else. I personally like ESPN, but like everything else you have to look past the bad and corny stuff. The more sports coverage the better in my opinion -- I do wish though it was covered more so by sports people, but what can you do.

[homer]

I suppose I should have read through all the rankings and team blurbs before posting. Oh well - egg on my face.

[nate82]

Page 2 is only good when there are actually jokes backing up the stuff. I know I might be in the minority in liking Bill Simmons, but at least that guy knows sports and makes crazy/funny remarks. This clearly made no sense and it's more ESPN trying to branch out as a pure media entertainment outlet than anything else. I personally like ESPN, but like everything else you have to look past the bad and corny stuff. The more sports coverage the better in my opinion -- I do wish though it was covered more so by sports people, but what can you do.

I only watch or listen to Mike and Mike in the morning now everything else on ESPN is garbage.

[pitchleague]

I read Simmons and TMQ every week (in season). page 2 is just supposed to be somewhat like ESPN's version of the Onion.