What if...

[hammytime]

Scarlett: "Rhett, where shall I go, what shall I do?"

Rhett: "Frankly my dear, I don't know. What do you like to do? Do you have any skills? Do you like to work with your hands?"

[bando1234]

All I can think of is the Brady Bunch Chistmas:

 

 

While singing O come all ye faithful, the building falls in & crushes Mike killing him.. The head contractor of the job Mike was working on turns out to be Carols 33 year old boytoy. After a short marriage he spends the nest egg that Mike worked so hard to create & Carol loses the house in foreclosure.

 

Greg devistated by the loss turnes to perscrition drugs & loses his MD lisence. Wally(Marci's Husband) never gets the job at the toy company & turns to selling crack on the street.He later gets caught, gets 12 year prison sentence while Marcia ends up living in cabrni green with her kids. Bobby dies in turn 4 of Talledaga during his premier race in Nascar. Jan & Phillip divorce. After her divorce she is no longer seen by family & friends. Neigbors report a strange smell coming from her apartment, however when police find her she has 127 cats roaming free in her apartment. Cindy's lisp comes back & she is ridiculed by 12 year olds as a server at Shakeys. Peter marries a trashy model, half his age who convinces him to do realty shows while their marriage is on the rocks.

[sbrylski]

Scarlett: "Rhett, where shall I go, what shall I do?"

Rhett: "Frankly my dear, I don't know. What do you like to do? Do you have any skills? Do you like to work with your hands?"

Best of the thread.

[Paulus88]

Col. Nathan R Gessup did not in fact order the code red, gets his star becomes a member of the Joint Chiefs

where he is integral in planning the invasion of Cuba to get those who try to kill him during breakfast.

Lt. Caffey is disbarred, loses his steak knives and boots the game winning pop up against Bethesda Medical, he is never seen again.

Pvts. Downey and Dawson are imprisoned and eventually transferred to Abu Ghraib.

[Fatter than Joey]

Growing quite tired of Jem and Scout stealing his soap dolls, a relieved Boo Radley watched Bob Ewell carry the 2 Finch children off into the darkness, from his porch window. Months later a disbarred and drunken Atticus Finch, staggering in the street, stopped and pointed at a young boy chasing a ball, and screamed at him ""You never know someone, until you step inside their skin and walk around a little." Young Ed Gein, shuddered and then smiled.

 

The End

[twobrewers]

hammytime wrote:

---

Scarlett: "Rhett, where shall I go, what shall I do?"

Rhett: "Frankly my dear, I don't know. What do you like to do? Do you have any skills? Do you like to work with your hands?"

Best of the thread.

That is some good stuff right there!

[Diskono]

Einhorn shoots Ace Ventura and Dan Marino. The Dolphins lose the Super Bowl and the shikaka never gets returned to the Wachati.

[pitchleague]

Indiana Jones does not make it out of the cave and gets flattened by the huge rolling ball. Thus, Raiders of the Lost Ark is nominated for a 1982 Oscar for Best Short Film instead of Best Picture.

[bullox]

The nuke goes off early and blows the ship to threads in Armageddon, leaving the world to a future of complete destruction.

[brewers19]

Indiana Jones does not make it out of the cave and gets flattened by the huge rolling ball. Thus, Raiders of the Lost Ark is nominated for a 1982 Oscar for Best Short Film instead of Best Picture.

 

Similar to this one.

 

Indiana Jones chooses... poorly. He soon disintegrates like the guy before him, and his father dies slowly and painfully from the gunshot wound.

[Baldkin]

The boat doesn't sink in Titanic and I never have to watch that terrible movie with a girlfriend again.

[fondybrewfan]

To go along with the topic of the day....

 

What if Martin Brody didn't hit the oxygen tank with his gun?

[heresrobin]

The police/paramedics immediately recognize that the surviving guard is Hannibal Lecter with somebody else's badly mangled face on top of his own.

 

"Lecter? Is that you? You have got to be kidding me! You didn't honestly think that would work did you!?!?" one of the police/paramedics asks incredulously.

 

Upon being found out, Lecter sits up quickly and tries to escape. He is shot and killed immediately.

 

Later, at Buffalo Bill's house, once he realizes that he has been discovered by Clarice, Buffalo Bill attempts to make a dash for his basement. Clarice shoots and kills him immediately.

 

A butterfly lands on a bottle of Chianti in the corner of the kitchen. Fade to black.

[Fike85]

Frankie Sharp decides that although Cassandra is a great talent, it just isn't the right time for her to be signed to a record deal. Shortly thereafter an electrical fire burns Wayne's house to the ground. Afterwards we see Cassandra and Benjamin together on a tropical island.