The Sober Thread

[lukevan]

Immediately thought of this song, someone should know the band:

 

"A couple of drinks midday, midday, midday..

Haven't felt this way, this way, since yesterday...

Beginning to sink and fade, and fade, and fade..

There's nothing that I would trade, to feel this way..

 

..

 

Like sprinting on a frozen pond

I took my chances

I may have lost my best friend."

 

As a lifelong introvert, a couple of drinks/beers help me be more social. I enjoy the occasional bender now, though in college it was a bender three/four times per week. I can certainly go without alcohol, but still enjoy it. I've only entered the blackout phase once and plan never to return.

[twobrewers]

I can't imagine a parent getting drunk and then coming home to kids that adore them, never mind the behavior that is often associated with not being sober.

Funny you mention the whole being a parent and getting drunk thing. My wife and I (no kids yet) have been talking about that one for awhile now. Her whole family is pretty big into drinking - and every holiday is a drinking fest. They are pretty responsible about it, but regardless alcohol is part of the life. She says its no big deal for a kid to see their parents drunk. But then she started drinking when she was 15 and had some fairly rough years in her life. (Granted, she is very responible now. But college was rough)

 

I've never once seen my mother or father drunk. I've seen them have a drink here and there - but never more than 3 or so. And this was very rare. We just never had alcohol in the house, and if we did it was only when guest were over to offer them some. Of the 6 kids that grew up in that household - 2 never touched a drink, 2 BARELY drink and 2 drink. And none of them started drinking before the age of 20.

 

So while drinking in front of your kids (not to mention being drunk) might not be the worst thing - I tend to agree with Al. It just sets a rough example for your kids.

[gypcasino]

My favorite song about alcohol goes a little something like this-

 

Get your bravery from a six pack

Get your bravery from a half-pint

Drink your whiskey, drink your grain

Bottoms up and you don't feel pain

Drink your whiskey, drink your grain

Bottoms up and you don't feel pain

 

Go out and fight, fight

Go out and fight, fight

Go out and fight, fight

Go out and fight, fight, fight

 

Lose control of your body

Beat the -- out of somebody

Half-shut eyes don't see who you hit

But you don't take any --

Half-shut eyes don't see who you hit

But you don't take any --

 

Go out and fight, fight

Go out and fight, fight

Go out and fight, fight

Go out and fight, fight, fight

[uecker9]

[align=center]It was my dad maybe it's your mother

Aunt or uncle a sister or brother

Cousin or a friend

Or maybe it's all of them

 

They start saying that tomorrow they'll be done

Another day passes and it's just as the other one

Soon you'll start living their lives too

 

And they keep saying that tomorrow they'll be done

Today and the next day but tomorrow it never comes

 

Would you have me turn my blind black eye

To what I've seen your dt's do to you

Have me sit and watch it suck the life right out of you

 

You try and help them knock that monkey off their back

But he just hides for a while in his sack

Like a needle in their arm is a bottle to their need

 

And they keep saying that tomorrow they'll be done

Today and the next day but tomorrow it never comes

A life full of those tomorrows piled one up on top of one

And you know that it's in the family and now it's your turn son

 

People fighting to keep their lives and homes together

Keep them full of love, hope and dreams as they once were

Where people live and care about one another

 

So please stop saying, so please stop saying

So please stop saying that tomorrow you'll be done

Today and the next day but tomorrow it just never comes

A life full of those tomorrows piled one up on top of one

And you know that it's in the family and now it's your turn son[/align]

[mothershipconnection]

I've never once seen my mother or father drunk. I've seen them have a drink here and there - but never more than 3 or so. And this was very rare.

 

I never saw my parents drunk as a kid either, but they partied all the time (dad was a musician and they married/had me at a young age). In our case, the grandparents really liked having us kids there, so my parents would leave us with them every other weekend and that's when they got their drinking in.

[JimH5]

I think the best thing that ever happened to me as it relates to drinking and drugs was working in bars from age 20 to 26. I saw enough different people make fools of themselves each and every night due to drinking and or drugs that it really hit home that I didn't want that to happen to me. During those days I might go out with my buds and have one to three drinks, but I just really didn't like the feeling of being out of control. Slurred speech, thinking I said something funny when in reality, it was just lame. Spending what little disposable income I had on nights out. I got to scratch whatever itch I had by being at work instead of spending the night on the other side of the bar.

 

I'm pretty much a two drink guy at this point, and even then, it will be maybe once or twice a year when I have a 2nd.

 

I truly admire people who confront their own problems and win the daily battle, whether it's with drinking or drugs, or smoking or food. I'm very glad that I don't have to fight the drink/drug urges. I just wish I had more willpower to eat healthy foods and partake in regular exercise.

 

Good luck to those who fight their battles.

[cweber39]

I don't believe that the only way to quit is to admit that you're powerless over your addiction and give yourself up to a higher power.

See that's not right. If someone is so addicted and they want to quit, but can't there is nothing wrong with going to AA to help kick the addiction. If you need somebody to talk to, or others to talk to at a meeting once a week, so be it. Do you think that people who go to AA meetings are weak, because they gave into a higher power?

 

I do think that the best way to quit drinking is not to drink.

Yeah, that's a little easier said than done for a lot of people.

 

And I also don't believe that alcoholism is a disease. And nobody in my family is an alcoholic either.

Are you an alcoholic? I think there is a difference between getting stupid drunk and blacking out than alcholism.

[gypcasino]

See that's not right. If someone is so addicted and they want to quit, but can't there is nothing wrong with going to AA to help kick the addiction. If you need somebody to talk to, or others to talk to at a meeting once a week, so be it. Do you think that people who go to AA meetings are weak, because they gave into a higher power?

No, I think they're weak because most of them relapse. The "success rate" for those who attend AA is less than stellar. I think there are alternative recovery groups without religious undertones that suit people better. I wasn't saying that any group that holds a meeting is bad.

 

Are you an alcoholic?

No, I don't think that I am. The way I worded that ("And nobody in my family is an alcoholic either") made it seem like I am. I meant to say that I believe that I can't place any of the blame of my drinking problems on others in my family. I wasn't implying that "other than me, nobody in my family is an alcoholic.

[uecker9]

There are a lot of alternative recovery programs without religious undertones. Even the ones through the hospitals like Newstart. There are also several different levels of treatment- inpatient, intensive outpatient, group or individual. People use the meetings for different reasons as well. Some need the structure in their life or need to be there at a specific time of day, some need people to listen to them,some just need to listen. I think each persons recovery is as different as their drug or drink of choice, if that makes any sense.

[PlayerHader]

gyp, I am pretty much in the same boat as you right now. Total inability to control how much I take in in one sitting. Blackouts were the norm for awhile and I'm working on it now. For a long time I told myself that the alcohol made me do the things I did. Recently I realized that I drank so much to have an excuse to do stupid things, things that would leave me shaking my head... until the next time out.

 

Drinking is big in both sides of my family. I enjoy having a beer or glass of wine with my uncles. I'm not trying to stay totally sober, but I am avoiding the buzz stage, which is where I seem to lose all cares and go on to drown myself in booze. I've been volunteering myself as the designated driver lately for things (I don't drink at all then), which helps keep me involved socially, but removes pressure of having a drink (and keeps my friends safe).

 

We seem to be in the same spot right now. I hope things work out for you well.

[GAME05]

wow, never expected this thread to get so heavy. nothing but the best to everyone on here who is making the effort to get better.

 

i've been the functioning alcoholic for a few long bouts before. it seemed either i would get so completely broke (during bouts of unemployment not related to the sauce) that i was forced to quit, or the good news in my life picked up that i didn't have the depth of sorrows i was trying to drown.

 

"people who try to drown their sorrows should know that sorrow can swim." Anne Landers, I believe.

[jaybird2001wi]

I was an anti-drinker when I started UW-Whitewater but once I turned 21, I broke loose and started going to the Whitewater bars almost EVERY night. But now I just can't drink every night, because I wake up feeling old (no offense to the mid 30 crowd here) and like I was 35 (I am 24). I will confess that I got a DUI in January and that has set me straight, I am starting to calm down to the point where I only "need" to drink once or twice a week. But there are times when I don't drink for an entire week.

[uecker9]

With your schedule jaybird, and some of the other hell week schedules - there's no time for drinking!http://forum.brewerfan.net/images/smilies/wink.gif

[pitchleague]

sung to the tune of "Do, Re, Mi" from The Sound of Music:

 

"Dos, a beer, a Mexican beer,

Ray, the guy I buy beer from,

Me, the guy I buy beer for

Far, a long way to go for beeeeeer,

So, I'll have another beer,

La, la, la, la, la, la, la,

Tea, no thanks I'll have a beer,

That'll bring me back to Dos, Dos, Dos, Dos"

(repeat ad infinity)

[gypcasino]

I will confess that I got a DUI in January and that has set me straight,

I got one in February, my first. And only. My luck finally ran out. I just got my license back last week.

[gypcasino]

I haven't had a drink since August 28th. It's going pretty well. I went to a Brewers game with a bunch of people who were all drinking and I still managed to have a good time. Not being hungover is the best part of quitting drinking.

[Schlitz001]

I'm not drunk right now and I think that deserves a post.

[M Skjellyfetti]

Way to go gypcasino. The first few months without drinking are pretty tough, but eventually one can get used to it. It's good to hear everything is going well so far.

[homer]

"Not being hungover is the best part of quitting drinking."

 

That's what did it for me. When I hit 30 my hangovers dropped me for an entire day.....it wasn't worth it anymore.

[GAME05]

"Not being hungover is the best part of quitting drinking."

 

That's what did it for me. When I hit 30 my hangovers dropped me for an entire day.....it wasn't worth it anymore.

same here. and i've got such a weak stomach that i can be hungover without ever being drunk. in your early 20s the fun of being drunk outweighs the hangover, but that balance sure changes the older you get.

 

don't get me wrong, i'm still a bit of a barfly, but on most occassions i limit it and have recently started asking the bartenders for "weak" mixed drinks.

 

age has helped, too, in that you stop caring about what other people might think of you if you sit at the bar and order a soda, and you stop caring about being part of that whole game of "who can drink the most," as if its a matter of honour or pride who can shotgun a beer the fastest or finish a case first.