What's bugging you? 2021

[stoutdude04]

I have not had to go through this on either side, but if I was to get fired I would want them to just tell me. I wouldn't want to get called into the office and have some small talk about the family or whatever. I'd want them to call me in and tell me why I was being let go and that be the end of it.

[FVBrewerFan]

It's really bugging me that I have to let someone go at work. I have never done anything like this before...nor is it a skill I want to improve. I've done a lot of difficult things in my life, but this is probably one of the most difficult. Managing people is something I thought I would never do and it isn't something I really enjoy. When the owners of the company ask you be in manager/leader/mentor role, you don't really have much of a choice, so I did it.

 

What makes it so tough is I have worked with them for roughly 5 years and I would consider them a friend. However, when it comes to the work, they just aren't a very good fit with our group and we figured it was just time to rip the band-aid off. I have done everything in my power to help them improve and it just isn't working out. My guess is this must be what it feels like to break-up with someone (I've only ever dated/married one person, so I wouldn't know). I know they aren't a Brewers fan, so I should be pretty safe writing this on this forum.

 

Any advice/insight into this situation is greatly appreciated.

As someone who has been on both sides of this situation my advice would be this: keep it simple, straightforward, and short. Odds are this probably isn't going to be a surprise to them. When I've done it HR was usually involved and let them handle the details.

 

Agreed. Nothing you say will make them feel better, so don't make it worse for both of you searching for the right thing to say. It sucks but it's part of life. And it sounds like it's the right decision, so remind yourself of that important fact. Firing people was never fun for me either, but I rarely lost sleep over it because it was necessary- and yea, they usually knew it was coming. Sometimes even a relief.

[GAME05]

Totally agree; keep it simple. They don't want to hear some long explanation from you about being their friend or anything like that because there's nothing you could say which would make them feel better. It's more rare, but don't let them ramble on and bargain, either.

[homer]

If you enjoyed letting someone go you'd be a sociopath. It's normal to feel bad.

[CheezWizHed]

Yes, as others said, keep it short and to the point. Don't let them argue or bargain; be firm about the outcome. If you have HR, it is good to have them there to explain the benefits. If the person needs to clean out a desk or something, it is nice to have someone else go with them. That person can console a bit and diffuse any anger.

 

I've not fired anyone, but I've done layoffs and been in both the bearer of bad news guy and the friend helping them clean out the desk guy. The process sucks all around.

[zurch1818]

Thanks for all the advice everyone. It's going to be tough...but it's the right thing to do for our team.

[LouisEly]

I've managed friends before - people who I became friends with prior to my promotion/realignments that caused me to become their manager, and people I became friends with after managing them. I always told them that we have two separate and distinct relationships - one personal, one professional - and whatever happens in one relationship shouldn't affect the other relationship.

 

Reinforce with this person that this is strictly professional, not personal, and has no bearing on your personal relationship. Reinforce their skills and what they are good at, and offer to help them find something that is a better fit for their skills and what they do well.

[Thurston Fluff]

Good memory. I love this place. I'm still a full-time Park Ranger, though. I started this job late enough that I need an extra bump in retirement. The pay:stress ratio of getting a promotion wasn't worth it, so thinking of an alternative second income led me to the idea of becoming a hot dog vendor in my spare time.

 

>Not great for a family though.

 

You mean my two cats? But you're right, though. I'm often envious of you guys.

 

I thought you were a police officer.

[GAME05]

Good memory. I love this place. I'm still a full-time Park Ranger, though. I started this job late enough that I need an extra bump in retirement. The pay:stress ratio of getting a promotion wasn't worth it, so thinking of an alternative second income led me to the idea of becoming a hot dog vendor in my spare time.

 

>Not great for a family though.

 

You mean my two cats? But you're right, though. I'm often envious of you guys.

 

I thought you were a police officer.

 

 

I'm a commissioned Park Ranger, so both. All the usual duties/powers of a regular officer but my jurisdiction is in the Park. National Parks will separate duties for their Rangers where you'll have some who do nothing but LE and others who do nothing but education. But I'm with the State, who has us doing a little of everything. Cut a tree in the morning, teach kids about turtles in the afternoon, domestic violence arrest in the evening.

[hawing]

Tonight I had COVID vaccine FOMO for the first time. My SO runs a weekly Zoom call for his family and tonight his siblings and siblings-in-law (all in Kenosha) were chattering excitedly about their scheduled first doses this coming week. They're all 65+. (SO just turned 64 this past week, though he's type-2 diabetic, so he may be bumped up the line this spring.)

My mom (80) is scheduled for her first dose Tuesday in Dane County. My sister and her husband, who both have public safety jobs in Dane County, got their first doses this past week. My brother and his wife are both teachers in southwest Wisconsin.

 

Pretty much all of them have solid reasons to warrant vaccination ahead of me, but I don't feel particularly risk-free, either, and my job is on-site and public facing part-time. A sister in law on the call tonight was all I'M JUST TIRED OF NOT BEING ABLE TO GO PLACES, while I was thinking "yeah, I'd just like to not be at risk of dying by going to my job."

 

(Yes, this could go in the COVID thread, but I wanted to emphasize that it bugs me.)

[jerichoholicninja]

Those Cascade dishwasher commercials that say you should run your dishwasher every night because it saves water over washing them in the sink. I have no doubts that a dishwasher uses less water but running it every night instead of waiting till it's full seems like it would negate any savings. Especially if you're a one or two person household.

[GAME05]

That sounds identical to wash-rinse-repeat. No actual benefit to you, but it would sure make you run through a lot of Cascade.

[CheezWizHed]

Possibly in rather than rinsing your dishes and letting food dry?

 

The only problem I have with the dishwashing saves water concept is that there are always pots that can't be cleaned in the dishwasher. So you end up doing some dishes anyway.

[FVBrewerFan]

Possibly in rather than rinsing your dishes and letting food dry?

 

The only problem I have with the dishwashing saves water concept is that there are always pots that can't be cleaned in the dishwasher. So you end up doing some dishes anyway.

 

Not if you use Cascade.

[homer]

Speaking of dishes....now that I've been working from home for a year I really HATE doing dishes....every day....every day.

[CheezWizHed]

Speaking of dishes....now that I've been working from home for a year I really HATE doing dishes....every day....every day.

 

[sarcasm]Have some kids![/sarcasm] My kids are getting into college/adult phase... It will stink to have to do dishes again.

[owbc]

Speaking of dishes....now that I've been working from home for a year I really HATE doing dishes....every day....every day.

 

On the plus side, I haven’t used a public restroom for months. Only the nice toilet paper for my bottom these days.

[Patrick425]

About a week ago my wife and I both received letters from WI Unemployment Insurance indicating that we had filed unemployment claims. We had not. We called WI unemployment to report the issue. They basically took our information, stated they put a hold on the claim, forward to the fraud division, and someone would call us back. Has been over a week now - still no call back. I called today and was told that the investigation takes time and that once that is through, they will call us. Shouldn't talking to me be part of the investigation? To complicate things a bit more, I handle employee payroll and HR where I work. So, also got a notice about this at work and had to call and fill out paperwork to report it as the employer - nothing back on that end either.

 

In the meantime we have done the things that were suggested including downloading our credit report from all three reporting agencies and freezing our credit information at all three so that no one can open any credit lines under our names. However, that would not prevent someone from doing something like filing a bogus tax return in our names. What I'm gathering from the IRS is that they have no interest in talking to you until someone actually does that. They have no interest in trying to prevent it before it happens.

[nate82]

About a week ago my wife and I both received letters from WI Unemployment Insurance indicating that we had filed unemployment claims. We had not. We called WI unemployment to report the issue. They basically took our information, stated they put a hold on the claim, forward to the fraud division, and someone would call us back. Has been over a week now - still no call back. I called today and was told that the investigation takes time and that once that is through, they will call us. Shouldn't talking to me be part of the investigation? To complicate things a bit more, I handle employee payroll and HR where I work. So, also got a notice about this at work and had to call and fill out paperwork to report it as the employer - nothing back on that end either.

 

In the meantime we have done the things that were suggested including downloading our credit report from all three reporting agencies and freezing our credit information at all three so that no one can open any credit lines under our names. However, that would not prevent someone from doing something like filing a bogus tax return in our names. What I'm gathering from the IRS is that they have no interest in talking to you until someone actually does that. They have no interest in trying to prevent it before it happens.

 

Sounds about right for any government agency. If it hasn't happened then it doesn't exist and therefore no action can be taken.

[homer]

About a week ago my wife and I both received letters from WI Unemployment Insurance indicating that we had filed unemployment claims. We had not. We called WI unemployment to report the issue. They basically took our information, stated they put a hold on the claim, forward to the fraud division, and someone would call us back. Has been over a week now - still no call back. I called today and was told that the investigation takes time and that once that is through, they will call us. Shouldn't talking to me be part of the investigation? To complicate things a bit more, I handle employee payroll and HR where I work. So, also got a notice about this at work and had to call and fill out paperwork to report it as the employer - nothing back on that end either.

 

In the meantime we have done the things that were suggested including downloading our credit report from all three reporting agencies and freezing our credit information at all three so that no one can open any credit lines under our names. However, that would not prevent someone from doing something like filing a bogus tax return in our names. What I'm gathering from the IRS is that they have no interest in talking to you until someone actually does that. They have no interest in trying to prevent it before it happens.

 

It's a huge issue. Google "fake unemployment claims" and there seems to be a news story from every state in the union.

[young guns]

A few years back someone filed a tax return as my uncle. I don't think it stopped them from actually filing at least. My guess is they "don't care" because they have enough manpower to worry about things like that before they happen.

[zurch1818]

Reinforce with this person that this is strictly professional, not personal, and has no bearing on your personal relationship. Reinforce their skills and what they are good at, and offer to help them find something that is a better fit for their skills and what they do well.

Yesterday was the day. It was probably one of the most difficult things I have done recently. All the advice everyone gave was definitely helpful and made it more manageable. I even vouched to be a reference for him. Who thought a Brewer's forum could provide this support? I felt guilty beforehand and even more guilty afterwards. That is something I never want to experience again. Last night was especially tough on me. Luckily Coyotes hockey helped me through it. I can't imagine what he is going through.

 

What I do know is he was completely blindsided. He though he was improving since our last meeting (which parts have...but others seem to get worse). I guess the lesson learned is first impressions last and they are difficult to change...especially if they are the owners of the company. To help him bridge the employment gap, we are giving him 30 days of optional employment after yesterday plus a month pay after his last day. He is also getting his remaining vacation paid out.

 

If anyone wants to see the end of the hockey game...pretty crazy spin o rama pass. They tied it up with 0.7 seconds left in the third and won in the shootout. Coyotes now have 3 straight wins on the Blues home ice.

 

[RobDeer 45]

Zurch1818 glad that you were able to get through the difficult situation. I hope the friendship can still be there. Remember, you did everything you could to make it as positive of an experience as you could. Glad they are doing all of that to help bridge the gap too.

 

It's crazy how much good advice you can get on a Brewer's site. I can't tell you how many random things I've asked for advice on at BF Net.

[LouisEly]

I have $485 in unused commuter benefits that I accumulated at the beginning of the pandemic waiting to return to work, which never happened. I recently left my employer and have 90 days to use the benefits, but I am still working from home in my new job. The IRS has not made any adjustment as far as I know to allow people to convert this to cash and pay taxes on it.

 

I have these benefits on a Visa debit card, though. Does anyone know what would happen if I used these funds for ineligible expenses? I can't find anything on Wageworks' website, and a web search came up empty; all I could find is what you can and can't use it for. Previously I attached this debit card to the account I had that I purchased my public transportation with, but I've never seen any statements or reconciliation of my purchases.

 

(On that note, anyone take public transportation or have parking charges for commuting, preferably in the Chicago area? I'll sell these benefits at a discount.)

[Baldkin]

I have $485 in unused commuter benefits that I accumulated at the beginning of the pandemic waiting to return to work, which never happened. I recently left my employer and have 90 days to use the benefits, but I am still working from home in my new job. The IRS has not made any adjustment as far as I know to allow people to convert this to cash and pay taxes on it.

 

I have these benefits on a Visa debit card, though. Does anyone know what would happen if I used these funds for ineligible expenses? I can't find anything on Wageworks' website, and a web search came up empty; all I could find is what you can and can't use it for. Previously I attached this debit card to the account I had that I purchased my public transportation with, but I've never seen any statements or reconciliation of my purchases.

 

(On that note, anyone take public transportation or have parking charges for commuting, preferably in the Chicago area? I'll sell these benefits at a discount.)

 

Your card will decline (or at least is should). They can only be used for transactions that are flagged the proper way through VISA. The same way as if you use an HSA or FSA card for non-medical charges.