Question about pet loss

[hawing]

Sorry in advance for the downer nature of this.

 

We had to have one of our cats euthanized last week. He was diagnosed with an unidentifiable growth on his liver last summer, the vet said he had "months" left, and he made it about 6.5 months.

 

We've been through the loss of a pet before, but this is the first time we've had a surviving pet - another cat. The two cats were not littermates, but were fostered together and we adopted them together 12 years ago, so they spent all but the first few months of their lives together.

 

So far we're just kind of keeping an extra eye on the surviving cat. He's not acting very much out of character. He meows a lot, but that has always been normal behavior for him. He's snuggly with me, which is also normal. He's eating a little less, we think, but he's not refusing food and water or anything.

 

I read up on pet grief (for lack of a better term) once we knew the sick cat's diagnosis, and came away with the basic impression that another pet's reaction can range all the way from full-on grief to "guess I get the whole house to myself now. Sweet."

 

I'm just wondering if the Brewerfan universe has experience with dealing with pets who survive the loss of another pet. If you do, but it's too sore a subject for you to want to contribute, that's okay. Thanks.

[stoutdude04]

This may not help at all, but I have a friend who had two dogs that were buddies for about 6 years. When the older dog had to be put down it was clear as day that the other dog was having a hard time with it. Would not eat and was withdrawn from everything. Like I said...obvious that this other dog was grieving. Less than a month later the other dog died of a heart attack. I would think if you are having a hard time trying to figure out your other cat then it might not be a major concern at this point, but I'd still monitor the situation for a bit.

[Thurston Fluff]

Sorry for your loss. If your pets are like mine they are full members of the household. Losing them leaves a hole for a while. I've had both the extremes you mentioned. We had a dog die and the other one didn't eat, moped around for weeks and didn't even want to go for walks or play in the back yard. That last go around our akita passed away and my border collie actually seemed happier. It wasn't like they didn't get along. They slept together and played together all the time. Both dogs passed away suddenly and without warning (apparently Akitas have a propensity for brain aneurysms.) The first one died in our back porch sometime during the day when we were at work. I came home and he was already cold. The last one passed away outside in the morning and we found him outside still warm. I'm not even sure the other dog was aware he died. I am sure the first one knew. I was always curious if she knew he was dead and didn't care or thought he was just gone for a while and never realized he was dead and was simply waiting for him to come back then got used to being alone. Then again my border has always been sort of a sociopath. I sometime wonder if she views me as anything more than a disk throwing machine. I think if I died and she was stuck in the house she might not even wait until she was hungry to start eating me. Might just have be waiting for me to die because she was curious what I taste like for all I know. Odd thing is, setting aside from not being all that affectionate, she is the most fun dog I have ever had.

[Bikeage77]

I'm sorry to hear your about all of your losses. I think cats deal with losing another pet differently from dogs, but I would just do everything I can to give your other cat extra attention, maybe get it a few new toys just to keep it active and let em know your thinking about them.

 

I'm no expert, but I'd imagine that extra bit of love would go a long way.

[RobDeer 45]

Sorry Hawing. I too think the extra attention is the best thing you can do. I think they figure it out after awhile and as time goes by they do better. I know you saw my post that our dog recently passed away. At first I didn't think our other dog really cared. I think he liked the extra attention we were giving him. I think he was confused for quite awhile. It almost seemed like he was waiting for our other dog to come in the door every time we came back to the house.

 

We decided to get another puppy a few weeks ago and our other dog did not love it. He usually loves all dogs, but he didn't want to play and seemed very depressed. He even was gaining weight. That's when it hit me, I think he was actually struggling a little bit with the other dog being gone. I do think he misses him. Of course throwing a puppy in to the mix is a lot to deal with as well, but hey are starting to get along a lot better now and our other dog seems back to normal.

 

Best of luck with the transition, it's not easy. I hope you are doing ok with the loss.