Smoking Cigarettes/Neighbor Problem

[jjkoestler]

A few days ago my roommate received a call from our landlord because he got a complaint from our neighbor about cigarette smoke. According to the neighbor the smoke blows into their house (I don't know how this is really possible given where our houses are located and where people smoke). I think the complaint is more about how they can smell smoke. A few of our house guests smoke and I will smoke occasionally too. My roommate (an attorney) who lives for arguments confronted the neighbors and it got a bit heated. To make a long story short, the neighbors want anyone who smokes to walk around the block to do it. This seems completely unreasonable to me, but I want to be a good neighbor. Any suggestions on how to handle this?

 

My thoughts as of now...

- We live in a city and therefore live in close proximity to people. Not everyone has the same habits, lifestyles, etc.

- The neighbor used to smoke. Seems hypocritical.

- The neighbor called our landlord instead of talking to us. I don't call the bank when I have a problem with a homeowner.

- I've walked down the block to have a smoke since the incident, but its not relaxing or enjoyable. I also feel a bit creepy walking to the end of the block and back at night.

 

The solution I was going to propose to the neighbor is:

- I'll walk to the end of the block under normal circumstances.

- I will not make guests leave my house.

- I will not leave the house when I have guests.

- I will not leave when its raining.

 

I feel like compromising is giving in to some very unrealistic expectations for city living though.

[RobDeer 45]

Is this two separate houses or an apartment? Where are you actually smoking in relation to their house? Just trying to get a better picture of this? I feel like you should be able to do whatever you like on your property as long as you aren't breaking rules. Is there another part of your property you could smoke in? Garage, backyard, etc?

[jjkoestler]

This is two separate houses.

 

Folks will typically smoke on my front porch. There is about 25 that separate the two properties.

 

It appears that they have a problem with anyone smoking on any part of the property.

[sveumrules]

I could see if you lived in the lower and the people in the upper were complaining because as we've all likely witnessed at one point or another, smoke rises.

 

If it is people in an adjacent house I'd say sorry and keep on smoking on my property whenever I felt inclined to do so. I see no way smoke can be blowing into their house unless you are standing at their window and physically blowing it in.

 

And for whatever it's worth, I am a non-smoker.

[TooLiveBrew]

I live in an apartment complex, and sometimes when people smoke outside, it definitely wafts into our 2nd floor unit if we have our windows open. I don't smoke, and don't like the smell.

 

But I would never even think of bringing it up. This is a non-issue for me. You're smoking on your own property.

[RockCoCougars]

Sounds like a great neighbor.... This makes my blood boil, and outside of an occasional cigar, I don't even smoke. Have you asked this neighbor if it's OK to have a cookout if their windows are open, and if charcoal smoke is more palatable for them? Good grief, this is not a health issue, it's a power trip. I'd tell them in no uncertain terms that if they don't like the faint aroma of smoke, they should close their windows and mind their own business. As for your landlord, I don't see what they can do as long as your lease doesn't explicitly prohibit smoking outside.

 

Please don't kowtow to their wishes and walk up and down the street to smoke....don't let them win. I'd actually suggest that you and your roommates/friends have a smoking party outside the next nice day that their windows are open.

[Baldkin]

Sounds like a great neighbor.... This makes my blood boil, and outside of an occasional cigar, I don't even smoke. Have you asked this neighbor if it's OK to have a cookout if their windows are open, and if charcoal smoke is more palatable for them? Good grief, this is not a health issue, it's a power trip. I'd tell them in no uncertain terms that if they don't like the faint aroma of smoke, they should close their windows and mind their own business. As for your landlord, I don't see what they can do as long as your lease doesn't explicitly prohibit smoking outside.

 

Please don't kowtow to their wishes and walk up and down the street to smoke....don't let them win. I'd actually suggest that you and your roommates/friends have a smoking party outside the next nice day that their windows are open.

 

Grill out. On the front porch. Every day. See if they complain then.

[Invader3K]

Yeah, they have nothing to stand on. I'd tell them to pound sand.

[burnzy24]

As long as your rental agreement allows you to smoke on the property then I would keep doing it. This may have to do more with the fact that your neighbor quit smoking and the smell is making it tough to remain an ex-smoker. However, if this is really the case your neighbor could fix it by simply closing the window whenever you smoke and not make you walk a block to enjoy something that you have the legal right to do on your own property. I feel for you though, neighbors can be completely irrational.

[1992casey]

Don't commit to going down the block. It'd be tough to undo that decision if you later decided it was an unreasonable request. Plus you could end up "annoying" someone else.

[brettac1]

Tell him to go to hell.

[RobDeer 45]

Ya that is BS. I mean, try to be nice, but really that's on them to shut their window. I'd be nice about it, but it's your right and you aren't trying to hurt them. You could put a fan on your porch that blows away from their house, as a gesture. But really they have no right to complain.

[JimH5]

I live midway up on a wooded hill, and I have a neighbor below me who likes to burn yard waste. The resultant smoke is unavoidable, and there are several days a year when we have to close the windows to seal out the smell of burning leaves and sticks. The rotten thing is, the nicest days for opening up the windows and letting fresh air in also seem to be the nicest days for this guy to be outside, poking away at his smoldering leaf pile. So we close the windows and complain to ourselves about the goof down the hill.

 

You have a right to smoke on your property, but understand that not everybody is going to be happy about it. I wouldn't take it personally. It's not about you. They just hate the smell of smoke.

 

By going to the landlord, they tried to avoid a conflict, but it's a pretty weak move, too.

 

The best solution for everyone is for you and your guests to quit smoking. But until then, your neighbors have to put up with it.

[thebruce44]

Personally, I'd start smoking more.

[jjkoestler]

Ok. I'm glad it's not just my friends and I who think this is a ludicrous request.

[bani1717]

As burnzy mentioned, the "problem" is likely magnified by the fact that the neighbor is an ex-smoker and is probably especially sensitive to the smell of smoke. I also agree with JimH that I think the best solution for everybody is to not smoke in the first place. However, with that being said...

 

There is a difference between what you have a legal right to do and what is the (maybe) nicer thing to do. I see where the neighbor is coming from if he/she is an ex-smoker and doesn't want to have to smell the smoke for any one of a number of reasons. I also see where you're coming from that you want to be able to smoke on your own property. It boils down to do you want to help the neighbor stay away from cigarettes (if that is really their main concern with smelling the smoke) or do you want to exercise your freedom to smoke on your property. No one else can really answer that question for you. You have to decide whether the sacrifice of not smoking on your own property is worth it to try to help the neighbor stay away from cigarettes (if that is really their main concern).

 

If I were a smoker in your shoes and the neighbor wasn't an ex-smoker, I would likely ignore their request. (And I am someone who has never smoked and despises the smell of smoke... but the neighbor has no business whining if it's simply a matter of personal preference.) The only complicating factor is that the neighbor is an ex-smoker and may be sensitive to the smell of smoke.

 

Edit: It also makes zero sense to me to start smoking more (as was suggested). Yes, it would get your point across to the neighbor, but I would not for a second consider doing more of an unhealthy activity solely for that purpose.

[TURBO]

Wow, I'm glad some of you aren't my neighbors.

 

It is common courtesy really. Is it a pain to live next to the guy, sure, but as a non-smoker myself, if my life was constantly being disrupted by someone who chooses to smoke and not consider those around me who do not smoke, I would find that to be rude.

 

I was s happy when the law took effect not allowing smoking in public places, no one happier to be honest. Gaining the freedom to take my family to restaurants, etc without the threat of secondhand smoke opened up a whole new world for us.

 

There will always be a riff between smokers and non-smokers, that can't really be avoided what it comes down to is common courtesy. Either you want to live peacefully with your neighbors, or you can take the attitude that many in this thread took and say screw you.

 

It's your decision in the end.

 

If you only smoke sometimes, why not just quit all together? Is it a social thing? I just don't get it...

[trwi7]

You're smoking on your property. There isn't a damn thing they can do about it as long as you're on your property.

[Dollarbill13]

Wow, I'm glad some of you aren't my neighbors.

 

It is common courtesy really. Is it a pain to live next to the guy, sure, but as a non-smoker myself, if my life was constantly being disrupted by someone who chooses to smoke and not consider those around me who do not smoke, I would find that to be rude.

I completely disagree. When renting, there's an expectation of quiet enjoyment but that doesn't allow you to completely dictate what takes place off your property.

 

I was s happy when the law took effect not allowing smoking in public places, no one happier to be honest. Gaining the freedom to take my family to restaurants, etc without the threat of secondhand smoke opened up a whole new world for us.

This is irrelevant. He's smoking on private property.

 

There will always be a riff between smokers and non-smokers, that can't really be avoided what it comes down to is common courtesy. Either you want to live peacefully with your neighbors, or you can take the attitude that many in this thread took and say screw you.

There's a line that should be drawn between trying to live peacefully with your neighbors and letting your neighbors dictate your life. He said there are 25 ft between the two residences so the most the neighbor is getting is an occassional scent of smoke. This is really no different than an occassional smell of a grill, sound of a radio/lawnmower, color of a lawn ornament, etc.

 

It's your decision in the end.

 

If you only smoke sometimes, why not just quit all together? Is it a social thing? I just don't get it...

Or maybe start smoking on a more reguilar basis!

[1992casey]

jj doesn't really mention the distance from the porch or the relative location of the houses, but he does state "I don't know how (smelling the smoke) is really possible given where our houses are located and where people smoke." It sure doesn't sound like people in his household are smoking right by the neighbor's window or anything like that.

 

Certainly, people don't want to inhale second hand smoke, have their eyes burn, have their clothes smell, have their furniture smell, etc. That's totally reasonable. I don't want to experience that either. This doesn't sound like this is a situation where any of that is going to happen.

[RobDeer 45]

Really, I'd try to be a good neighbor and do what you can to help them out with their issue of smelling the smoke. Like if it's a nice day, walk around a bit or whatever. If it's raining or you are hanging with friends, don't feel bad for having a few smokes. It sounds like you aren't out there that often, right? If issues continue, I'd just say, always try to take the high road. Have a conversation and see if there is a way you can meet in the middle and both be kind of happy.

[brewcrewdue80]

If you would qualify as a "Chain Smoker" then the neighbor probably has a legit complaint. As a non-smoker there are a number of co-workers I work with who just need to walk by within 10ft of me and I can just plain smell the chainsmoking that there clothes have been through. Without the person actually smoking at that time.

My brother/mother were chain smokers. It's lousy.

 

But, if you or your friends are the type of smokers where I'd say less than 1pack if even half a pack a day, there's no way you are to put it

"Pig Pen" from Charlie Brown. That's the visual I can give that discribes how a chain smoker smells. It just hits you in dirty dusty waves.

 

Honestly though, a space outside of 10feet, even down wind it's hard for me to see the smoke creating some kind or trigger/being potent enough to make a complaint. And it sounds like you're more than double that away.

 

Have you spoken with them and asked what it is that is causing them to complain? \

 

Yes, common courtesy towards your neighbor is nice and all...But how is it a courtesy to the smoker walking around the block to enjoy a 2min smoke?

Maybe the neighbor hasn't quit smoking. The guy is sneaking in smokes and the wife is complaining she smells smoke on him. And she's falling for his excuse that it's obviously due to the neighbors constant wreak of smoking making its way in to their house.

That seems more legit to me than your smoke actually having an impact on them.

[DHonks]

Ah, I expected this to be from the other side. I just don't know anybody that smokes, so I assumed you were here to complain about someone smoking.

 

Anyways, tough dilemma. Some people freak out too much. But some people aren't very respectful with their smoking. I guess I would suggest talking with your neighbor to solve the issue.

[BrewersSuperCollector]

FWIW I'm not a smoke.

 

I wouldn't talk to the neighbor. The neighbor has the problem and should come to you. He was just a coward about it and went to the landlord.(Does he rent also? Have the same landlord?) This guy sounds like he'll complain about anything you do that inconviences him in the slightest bit.

 

For those that said they would smoke more, Thats Absurd. I'd probably get an incense stick for the front porch though.

 

If the neighbor would have come to me with his concerns I would absolutely understand and try to curb those issues.

 

How long have you lived next to this neighbor?

[FVBrewerFan]

My initial reaction would be to tell them I'm not Mother Nature, so I can't control which way the wind blows.

 

BUT, I've learned over the years I feel better taking the high road. Empathize with your neighbor, yea I understand it must suck to smell the smoke since you're a non-smoker, etc. But I am not going to walk out of my own house to smoke, and certainly not ask my guests to do so. So sorry, I hope you find I'm otherwise a good neighbor and would like to help out here, I just don't see anything realistic to solve the problem.

 

This way, you can hold you head up high- you are the bigger person. If the neighbor is still upset, now it's on them. If you go the "screw you" route, you may have other neighbors turn against you also.