(not really the) Transcript of the ACTUAL presser from Tuesday's game (just a bit of fun!)

[bigredrobbo]

Tony La Russa: You want answers?

Greg Matzek: I think I'm entitled to them.

La Russa: You want answers?

Matzek: I want the truth!

La Russa: You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a

world that has rules.

And

those rules have to be defended by the St. Louis Cardinals. Who's gonna

do it? You? You, Mr. McCalvy? I have a greater responsibility than you

can possibly fathom. You weep for Braun and you curse the Cardinals. You

have that luxury. You have the luxury of

not knowing what I know: that Braun's plunking, while tragic, probably

protected Albert.

And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, protects

Albert...You

don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about

at parties,

you want me upholding those rules. You need me upholding those rules.

We use words like sending a message, retribution, payback...we use these words as the backbone to a

life spent defending the Cardinals way. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time

nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the

blanket of the very game I invented, then questions the manner in which I invented

it! I'd rather

you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest

you pick up a bat and stand in the batters box. Either way, I don't give a damn what you

think you're entitled to!

Matzek: Did you order the plunking?

La Russa: (quietly) I did the job Albert sent me to do.

Matzek: Did you order the plunking?

La Russa: You're g*ddamn right I did!!

 

 

Bud Selig explodes!

[PrinceEatMeat]

First off, that happened Tuesday. Second, what's the point of this?

[markedman5]

priceless......lol...well done

[bigredrobbo]

First off, that happened Tuesday. Second, what's the point of this?

First - thanks for the correction.

 

Second - lighten up, Francis. It's called humor.

[Dragonbait]

I had a good chuckle at it..

[PrinceEatMeat]

First off, that happened Tuesday. Second, what's the point of this?

First - thanks for the correction.

 

Second - lighten up, Francis. It's called humor.

Sorry just seen this scene ripped off too many times. Doesn't do much for me. I'm sure others will enjoy it. Don't know why it needs it's own topic is all.

[LS Brewer]

That was terrific! It's funny because it's true (well almost true)

[AZBrewCrew]

that was pretty good!

[jimmyjeromehardy7]

loved it, that scene is one of the best ever

[gregmag]

Well done!

[filthyfrog]

That was awesome. Made my day.

[bigredrobbo]

Apparently, Greg Matzek was contacted by three St. Louis journos after the press conference aired, praising him for having the balls to hold TLR's feet to the flames. They are as embarrassed of him as we would be if he was our manager spouting the guff he does.