Any advice for a soon to be dad of a girl?

[whizkid]

You have to provide guidance and can't/shouldn't avoid giving verbal advice but kids are going to take in more from your example than from your words.

 

My son now 17 has always been more reasonable taking our advice into consideration when it is first brought up. My daughter, now 15, has always been more reactive and demonstrative when we bring something up for the 1st time. So we've learned to bring things up to her, then not mention it for a couple days. Then when we bring it up again, she's more willing to discuss it and perhaps has already come around to agree with us. Not all battles are won on the spot. Kids are different so if something isn't working, learn from it and try a different approach.

[cubfan1126]

With Easter fast approaching, I am reminded of that day when after arising so that the girls could hunt for and find all the eggs and baskets, the wife and I went back to sleep and let them play alone for a while (I think they were 7 and 5) Anyway when we got up for the day, breakfast was made; all the hardboiled eggs were peeled and set on plates for us. Yummm!

 

As far as the difference between boys and girls -

Girls - never had to worry about school work - but the peer pressure was like batting in the 9th with 2 out and 2 on and down by 1.

Boys - never had to worry about friends (just give them a ball) but we knew every principal, vice principal, dean of students, etc. (besdies that he learned to hate the Packers real fast . http://forum.brewerfan.net/images/smilies/smile.gif )

[craigharmann]

Oh and pick the cartoons you want them to watch carefully.

Yeah, we're not planning on much cartoons. I'm a musician, so she's going to (and has been) very well versed in the good music. Classical, Jazz, Church Music (it's my job), Orchestral, and that will take more priority. I have a piano, keyboard and guitars. So she'll be playing along with me very quick, I hope. We do have a DVR, and that is a huge help anyway. I am planning on making sure that one of the things she gets with "daddy time" is not only musical indoctrination, but sports indoctrination as well. She will grow up liking the Packers, Brewers and Spurs. I'm leaving soccer up to her if she wants to play it or not. But I will encourage her to play sports, as well!

[davego]

I have a freshly minted 8 yr old little girl. Abby is great. That said sometimes she is the herald of the apocalypse.

 

What I have learned over the years with her is to not try to win most or really hardly any of the battles. Only a few things to I put my foot down on. Other then that, if she wants to play "Pretty, Pretty Princess" and mock me, or insists that I watch the same episode of "Suite Life of Zack and Cody" for the 54th time; I'm in. I figure soon enough she will be gone.

 

I leave the fights to her and her mom.

[Fatter than Joey]

I've considered a gun, not for myself, but a shotgun for down the road if a boy decides to think about taking her out on a date.

 

I decided long ago, that I would push all my frustrations into a big black ball of pain and rage in my stomach -- to be unleashed on their first suitors -- the need for any sort of firearm has long since passed.

 

We also have a dog and a cat,

 

I was watching a TV show once, and I am pretty sure that cats try to suffocate babies and steal their souls -- you may want to research that.

 

As for the belt, I am a firm believer in belts. Not only to hold my pants up.

 

You should really reconsider your position here -- I found spankings to be very counterproductive -- it basically sends the message that you resolve things through hitting.

 

That might be a difficult thing to do when the time comes,

 

That's probably the instinct you should heed.

 

I don't think I'll resort to what my mother did when I talked back to her. Soap. Tasted NASTY!

 

My wife recently did this to one of the girls -- I laughed a lot on the inside. Then my daughter came to me, and said -- "what are you going to do about this?" I told my daughter to ask her mom "What in the hell are you thinking?". She didn't take the bait.

 

I have a freshly minted 8 yr old little girl. Abby is great. That said sometimes she is the herald of the apocalypse.

 

Best line of the thread.

 

What I have learned over the years with her is to not try to win most or really hardly any of the battles.

 

Yeah -- you can't die on every hill. Sound advice.

[jwill535]

As the only man in the house, you never win battles you are just allowed to retreat with your life.

[fondybrewfan]

I don't have any kids yet but I will soon enough and I am terrified. I have no experience whatsoever. My wife was born to be a good mom though so I have that going for me. I occasionally help my wife watch the kids she nanny's for and I freak out after a couple hours usually. A little girl (About 4) insists on saying the correct term for male genetalia in every other sentence. I get all blushy every time she says it, it just doesn't seem right.

[Brewtacular]

Man, this thread is making me feel like the next 6 months before my wife is due will be like walking the green mile with the other condemned giving me the knowing head-nod as I pass by.

[jwill535]

I bowl once a week during the winter and have through bloody and somewhat unspeakable battling gotten myself to be able to play 2 nights of softball this year. My daughter turns 3 this year and most of the ball comes at her bedtime and when she is asleep. Other then those 4 hours a week I am at home with her and my wife and it took this long to convince her to let me play two nights. So yes your life will change.

[davego]

Life does change, but mostly for the better. Now the bad can get stupid-bad, but its been a pretty fun trip thus far.

[bork]

Man, this thread is making me feel like the next 6 months before my wife is due will be like walking the green mile with the other condemned giving me the knowing head-nod as I pass by.

 

We all make joes, but I certainly wouldn't give it up for anything. I will never forget the first time seeing my son when he was born. He was crying of course, but as soon as I held him and he heard my voice, he calmed down. Nothing like it in the world.

[pretendastronaut]

This is a pretty funny thread, with some good thoughts!

 

I wouldn't say you're walking the green mile exactly Brewtacular. That's not to say you shouldn't soak up the next 6 months though. Yes you obviously lose freedoms you previously enjoyed, and you're life changes in almost every manner, but I'd never consider giving up being a father for a moment, if given the opportunity.

 

craigharmann, we try to avoid the television as much as we can with them, though it is helpful sometimes I must admit, and I know we won't keep it away from them forever by any means. Anyway, if you do any television, there is a show on Noggin called Jack's Big Music Show. It's puppets that focus on music and instruments. It is pretty much our go to choice if we turn on the tv and the boys love it. At 11 months old, one of them already dances with the show and they both will clap along with it. They recently moved it to 10pm and 10:30pm unfortunately, but you should dvr a couple a see what you think.

 

And fondybrewfan, before our boys were born, I'd changed all of one diaper, that had resulted in my nephew urinating on the floor after he got all of his clothes off and tore off into the house. The very first time the nurse asked us if we wanted to change our sons, Avery peed on me. I've gotten way better since then. You'll do fine once you enter the game.

 

jwill535, I grew up the only man in my house. I had 3 sisters and my parents were the splits, so I can somewhat relate to your pain. Now that my wife is the only woman in the house, I decided in the future, her vote counts twice, since she is outnumbered. Plus then, there can never be a tie vote either.

[trwi7]

My wife recently did this to one of the girls -- I laughed a lot on the inside. Then my daughter came to me, and said -- "what are you going to do about this?" I told my daughter to ask her mom "What in the hell are you thinking?". She didn't take the bait.

Absolutely classic. http://forum.brewerfan.net/images/smilies/laugh.gif

 

pretendastronaut wrote:

---

The very first time the nurse asked us if we wanted to change our sons, Avery peed on me.

I did the same thing to my dad. One of my proudest moments. http://forum.brewerfan.net/images/smilies/wink.gif

 

 

[whizkid]

I was told I did that to my Grandma. All you need to do is put a small washcloth over it and make sure it stays there. Girls are tougher than boys. You need to keep number 2 out of the place where it doesn't belong and if some gets in there you need to get it out. Hopefully you've had or will have some instruction in this.

[jwill535]

Here another good piece of advice. Kids, especially ones that go to daycare, are walking germ factories. Dont make this mistake that I did. My daughter had a stomach bug. I got her a strawberry shake because I thought it would be something that would ease her stomach cramps. Well she drinks half and hands it to me and says "daddy take a drink", half paying attention I grab it and as my lips wrap around the straw and begin to drink I have one of those movie flashback scenes in my head of all the nasty nasty diapers from the last couple days and realize that I just knowingly just infected myself. Well that next day I was awoken by the rumbling(you all know what that is) and perceeded to spend the next couple days wearing a path to the bathroom and losing 10lbs in the process.

 

As for a daycare, I highly reccommend it. You can be the best teacher in the world and have the greatest teaching plan laid out but kids tend to learn better amoungst their peers. A good place knows how to teach kids and has programs that are designed for kids that age. Our daughter is very smart and we credit alot of what she has learned to the daycare.

[TracyThom]

We have an 8-year old daughter and a 6-year old son. I'll be honest and say that I was a little bit disappointed when I found out our first child was a girl. I wanted a boy first. 8 years later I can say that my kids (both daughter and son) are the most important thing in my life. I'm probably a little closer to my daughter and my wife is closer to our son. My daughter is 100% daddy's girl.

 

Think of the things you will learn because you are having a girl:

 

-Spanish: Buenas suelte!, espera, and of course, "Swiper no swiping."

 

-Fashion: You will learn the difference between shorts, capris, and gouchos.

 

-Zoology: You will learn the different species of kitties, ponies, or whatever kind of animal your daughter gets into

 

I have to disagree with the others here about smooth sailing until middle school. There is drama in elementary school. My wife read my daughter's diary (I know, I know) and my daughter put an entry on how she likes this boy, and she doesn't want to hurt her other friend's feelings because she likes him too. There are little cliques in elementary school, and lately my daughter (3rd grade) has had an obsession on who has the biggest house, nicest clothes, best things like Ipods, etc. SHE IS 8 YEARS OLD!!

 

I wouldn't trade it for a thing.

[craigharmann]

So, she made it into the world yesterday morning at 12:26 AM. I'm screwed. She looks like her mother, and she's such a cutie. Thanks for all of the advice and I will try to follow as much of it as I can.

[tristarscoop]

Congratulations!

 

Don't be fooled by ages as road markers. In my head I think, ok, middle school is the boy-girl time, but I had my first major crush in third/fourth grade. That doesn't sound so bad until you realize that put me in the 8-9 year old age. I have a hard time putting my head around that, but there you are...

 

I was (am?) a huge tomboy. I played soccer on all boys teams til they got taller and skinnier and I rounded out instead. I started at age 4. I wonder if this was all part of my dad's plan. It was an accomplishment the first week of high school to wear neither soccer shorts or a tournament tshirt for an entire week. My most expensive piece of clothing for many years were my goalie jersey and gloves.

 

So you might want to push her on the tomboy route....

[JimH5]

Congrats to you and your wife. . .

 

There's really no going back now, so enjoy your new life, Dad.

[hawing]

So, she made it into the world yesterday morning at 12:26 AM. I'm screwed. She looks like her mother, and she's such a cutie. Thanks for all of the advice and I will try to follow as much of it as I can.

So, April 14? If so, she shares a birthday with my mother. It's worked out nicely for her. Congratulations!

[brewers4eric]

Congratulations:

 

We've got a girl and a boy. My daughter stuck her tongue out at me in the delivery room. My son let the urine stream fly. My wife asked me what I wanted for my birthday and I told her, "A good night's sleep". I haven't had one since the kids were born.

 

Start your family traditions as early as possible. Hang some Brewers memorabilia on the wall above your changing table. I've got some autographed baseball cards in a frame above ours and my son points to them after a fresh change and we go through the names: Cecil Cooper, Gorman Thomas, Ben Oglivie.... When he learns to talk we'll review their stat lines.

 

Have fun. I've survived being a parent for almost four years. If I can do it, anyone can.

[davego]

Congrats as well. I suspect it will be a great ride.

[TooLiveBrew]

Congrats Craig... Now run! http://forum.brewerfan.net/images/smilies/smile.gif

[Fatter than Joey]

Congrats!

[cooprules]

That is so cool. Congratulations. My little girl has t-ball TRYOUTS tomorrow...

 

...yes, I typed that correctly, t-ball TRYOUTS!