Richard Justice: Astros Have No Weaknesses

[rotoherb]

Apparently, Astros beat writer Richard Justice thinks the Astros are rock solid.

 

Frankly, I can't find a single weakness with the 2009 Astros

 

I really don't want to underestimate any opponent, but, really? Not a single weakness? PECOTA has the Astros pegged for 67 wins, by the way.

[TooLiveBrew]

After correctly foretelling the Brewers' demise in 2009 based off of strolling through the clubhouse after one loss, Richard Justice sets out to continue his sorcerer's ways... why do you mock our base mortal minds, Justice?!

 

 

One is that the NL Central turns out to be better than we think. We agree the Cubs are going to be good, but the Pirates, Reds and Brewers are mystery teams. They could all be lousy, or they could all be competitive.

 

The Brewers, a playoff team in 2008, who by most projections are at 85 or more wins, are such a mystery!

 

 

If I've told Berkman this one time, I've told him a thousand times: Be more like sportswriters.

 

We don't complain. We get up everyday thankful for what we have and don't focus on what we don't have. We're role models in every sense of the word.

 

Oh give me a freaking break, you hack. Get a grip.

 

 

EDIT: Cheezwiz beat me to it... what a moron this guy is. But hey, he's on TV sometimes!

[CheezWizHed]

If I've told Berkman this one time, I've told him a thousand times: Be more like sportswriters.

We don't complain. We get up everyday thankful for what we have and don't focus on what we don't have. We're role models in every sense of the word.

Well, you could start with a glaring weakness at sportswriter position...

He must be doing this tongue-in-cheek, right? He can't seriously have just written that...

[giffted1]

Can't the guys at Fire Joe Morgan come back for this doozie? The Astros have Mike Hampton as there #2 starter. The Mike Hampton that makes Ben Sheets and Rich Harden look like Cal Ripken Jr. Get real, Richard.

[endaround]

Yes the scary thing is Richard Justice is held up to be a national expert on baseball.

[sheethead]

"The Reds and Pirates are headed in the right direction. I have no idea if they'll take a big leap forward this year or next, but both franchises appear to have the right people in place."

 

Soooooooo, this guy calls himself a professional? He just ruined any credibility with his notion the Pirates are heading in the right direction. Who else in all the baseball world is saying the Pirates are going to make a leap into contention this year or next? Richard Justice, if it wasn't official last year it sure is now, you are a joke.

[endaround]

Actually the media have been pushing the Pirates and KC as the next Rays based on the fact that because the Rays really sucked and are now good other teams that really suck must soon be good too!

[Ennder]

The Pirates are going in the right direction. They just have a long path ahead of them still. The Pirates are in the same situation the Brewers were in 10 years ago,a small market team that was poorly run as well. They just got in new and much improved management and things will start to turn around there now.

 

The Astros are more likely to be fighting with the Pirates for 5th place than with the other teams for 2nd place though. That team has holes all over the place, CF, 3B, #3, #4, #5 SP. A 2B who is injury prone and a SS who looks to be on the wrong side of his career. Pence, Berkman, Oswalt and Lee are talented but it isn't enough. They need some big rebounds, career years or just luck to end up .500.

[homer]

Wandy Rodriguez is decent enough as a back of the rotation guy.

 

I mean.....there's that.

 

 

And there's this:

Michael Bourne holds the key to Houston's playoff fortunes

 

I can't help feeling like these articles are jokes. He can't really feel this way can he? Does he moonlight for The Onion's sports department and just submit the articles to the wrong publication?

[joepepsi]

This has to be sarcasm. No one would seriously write this: "If I've told Berkman this one time, I've told him a thousand times: Be more like sportswriters.

 

We don't complain. We get up everyday thankful for what we have and don't focus on what we don't have. We're role models in every sense of the word. "

 

Berkman is considered one of the good guys in baseball, with an upbeat, solid attitude. He's making fun of the team. Even a person who only follows the most casual of stats would know Russ Ortiz staying healthy could only hurt a team, not help it.

[Gobias Industries]

This has to be sarcasm. No one would seriously write this: "If I've told Berkman this one time, I've told him a thousand times: Be more like sportswriters.

I'm sure Lance Berkman is thrilled to be gettting "advice" from this dork. On a side note, this guy is off-the-charts on the Unintentional Comedy Scale.

[dogs with bees in their mo]

I think the bit about Berkman was a joke, the problem is that Justice is so clueless that it's hard to tell if he's being sarcastic or just slightly dumber than usual.

[jwill535]

I can see how you could call the Brewers a mystery team due to starting pitching alone. They are relying on a guy who hasnt pitched a full year in the big leagues, a potential #2 Parra who can be Jekyll and Hyde and then 3 journeymen. The argument can easily be made that the Reds have a much better staff and in fact I would trade their staff for the Brewers straight up.

[trwi7]

Michael Bourne holds the key to Houston's playoff fortunes

He's just 26 years old and has had just 594 career ABs. That's just over one full season.

And in those 594 at bats, he's hitting .237/.299/.313

 

I wish Richard Justice was the Astros GM and we could put Ed Wade on the Cubs. Or maybe Justice on the Cubs. Either way, it'd be bad for both teams.

[Brawndo the Thirst Mutilat]

Man, I hate this guy. His material always reeks of infinite contempt for his audience, like your typical explosion-riddled Bruckheimer / Bay thrillfest starring Nicholas Cage.

 

I mean, why not go ahead and add that sportswriters are also notoriously excellent lovers, with breath as fresh as daisies in spring? I've also heard that they can cure the afflicted with their touch, and manipulate physical reality through will alone. Maybe if you put all that at the end of your article you'll get the rise out of your audience you're looking for, Justice.

[TheCrew07]

He's a clown, at least Tom H will be critical of the team, even if his criticisms are off the mark. I'll take "big boy" time over this joker...

[datrain711]

you guys are tilting me by thinking he is being serious.

 

He was just on the D List about an hour ago and spent his time making fun of how bad the situation is. He and haudricourt were reminiscing about times when they broke camp knowing their teams had no chance to do anything

[sheethead]

If he wasn't serious with this post, it wasn't apparent.

[Brawndo the Thirst Mutilat]

The issue isn't whether he's being serious. Of course he isn't. The issue is that every sportswriter knows these "hope springs eternal" spring training pieces are pointless drivel, but Justice wants to write one and at the same time say, in an all-too-thinly-veiled fashion, "Here it is, imbeciles...the pointless drivel you expect, enjoy, and deserve...capped off with some really strange ironic self-congratulation that will trigger your idiot outrage reflexes."

 

If you read this article, he treated you like an imbecile. I get angry when someone treats me like an imbecile.

 

A related question (chicken or egg) -- which came first? That we are a nation of imbeciles, or that the people responsible for delivering the news to us treat us like a nation of imbeciles?

[endaround]

Justice is a master of the "it was a joke column!" Meaning if the Astros start 10-20 he'll say he joked about it, jeeesh you guys just don't get it!. If they start 20-10 he'll point to this post as to how he predicted it.

[samwise]

They also do not have any strengths...

[JimH5]

It's clear he meant it all in jest. He closes the piece with "We're role models in every sense of the word."--referring to sportswriters.

[datrain711]

If he wasn't serious with this post, it wasn't apparent.

 

are you leveling me here? I think it is pretty obvious he isn't being serious.

[RU Rah Rah]

I think that the sportswriter bit at the end is a joke, but the rest of it seems as though he means it. (And, if he doesn't, he needs to learn how to write better satire.)

[sheetskout]

Justice is a master of the "it was a joke column!" Meaning if the Astros start 10-20 he'll say he joked about it, jeeesh you guys just don't get it!. If they start 20-10 he'll point to this post as to how he predicted it.

Heh. I guess he's just covering his bases (PUN INTENDED!!!!)

 

Lol.