Engagement Ring Spending?

[JoeH33]

So I'm at that point where I'm looking into engagement rings. I'm just kind of curious how much people thought was an appropriate amount to spend on a ring. I realize this is very subjective due to age/financial situation etc, so to get some perspective I'm a 24 yr old who's just about finished with college.

 

I've gone to some jewelry stores and it seems I can get something pretty nice in the $3500-$4000 range.

[jwill535]

First off stay away from Platinum, its way more expensive and will cost you more in the end. If she, like my wife, prefers silver get white gold. It will need to be replated at some point but that should be covered if you get the coverage plan.

 

Some advice

 

1.) Find out what cut she prefers. Certain cuts will look better on her or she will prefer it.

 

2.) Dont get caught up in the size of the main diamond. I got my wife a 3/4 K main diamond with Baggots(sp) along the sides. It cost less then the main sizes but sparkles more then bigger single diamonds.

 

3.) Try to get a diamond just below a benchmark, it will be cheaper. For example get a .68 vs .75, you will never notice the difference but it will cost hundreds less.

 

4.) Get it appraised and insured right away. Also get it appraised every other year too as it will increase in value due to inflation. Then that way if she loses it like my wife did you will get more back then you would. Dont be shocked when the appraised is alot less then you paid for it. Stores mark up diamonds 2-300%.

 

5.) If you can get a set, Ring and band then do it. If she wants a band she will probably want it to be soddered to the ring. If you get the set you will be ensured that it will be able to be connected.

 

6.) **Cynical Post** Never give it to her on a holiday or birthday. If for some reason she breaks off the engagement you would have no recourse in getting it back if you gave it on a "gift giving" day. The courts reccogonize an engagement ring as a contract between the two of you for marriage. If she breaks up with you she technically is breaking said contract and you have the right to get it back. Hopefully that doesnt happen to you and thankfully didnt happen to me.

[hawing]

I'm afraid that as a non-wearer of jewelry, I'm the wrong person to ask.

However, I am loving the juxtaposition of your lead post and your signature. http://forum.brewerfan.net/images/smilies/smile.gif Good luck with your ring quest.

[Paul77]

Obviously there are plenty of great rings in all price ranges and it seems everyone's got their own idea's on the "perfect ring". The main thing to remember is to get something you know she will like. Remember she has to live with this forever and will be showing it to friends and strangers for years and years. You want to make sure she will feel proud to show it off.

 

That said, your price range (3-4k) should net you a nice ring. The most important thing I can say though is: DO YOUR RESEARCH. Just like buying a car. Make sure you know what you looking for and that you understand what everything means. Know your cuts, know what she wants, know your four C's...

 

As for what is an appropriate amount, I'm going to guess you get a wide variety of responses. Personally I spent $4,700 but I've seen great rings that cost much less and I've seen more expensive rings that look less impressive (and vice versa, of course). I guess the trick is to make every dollar count. Again, that's where the research comes in to play.

 

I agree with the above posts about appraisals and insurance too. The idea of shooting for just under your benchmark sounds like a good idea as well. Good luck!

[logan82]

I would recommend going to Kesslers jewelers. I bought a loose diamond and they put it in a setting. Do your research and don't be in a hurry to buy. Read up on the 4 C's.

 

I went to Kesslers and I had a friend go to Kesslers as well. He had a friend that bought the engagement ring somewhere else but his wedding rings at Kesslers. His friend said he wished he had gone to Kesslers for the engagement ring as well.

[bork]

logan3825[/b]]I would recommend going to Kesslers jewelers.

Yup, here's another vote for Kesslers. They cover everything, including losing the ring. They'll clean it, fix it, etc, whenever you want for free. You don't have to take it in every 6 month or every year, like some places, to keep the warranty. I've had great luck with them.

[Minigoon]

I would recommend going to Kesslers jewelers.

 

I agree 100%. I bought my wife's engagement ring there 8 years ago. About 3 years ago one of the small diamond chips was lost. We took the ring back and a new one was put in no questions asked. Great selection of diamonds in all sizes and price ranges.

[JoeH33]

Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it!

 

Edit: Thanks for the heads up on Kesslers as well. I went into the Jareds on the west side of Madison, and although they were really nice and helpful, I just sort of felt like I was looking at jewelry at the "Wal-Mart" of jewelry stores.

[JumpinMacFlash]

I just purchased an engagement ring a week ago. I went to a private jeweler in town and they were able to knock off about 1/5 of the price for me. My price range had a ceiling of about $2000, and like JWill said, I bought just under a half-carat and it cost less. I'm hoping to upgrade the stone after a while when my budget is larger, and they said they will give me exactly what I paid for the stone toward a larger diamond. I also am having it appraised right away. Also, don't be afraid to ask if they can give you a better deal on the ring/stone. It doesn't hurt anything to ask and they might just say yes.

 

The last thing I'm going to echo is trying to find out as much as you can about your girlfriend's tastes. I've been able to pick up things through subtle comments or questions, like her size, that I should use white gold and that she likes solitaires. The work was almost done for me.

[JoeH33]

JumpinMacFlash wrote:

The last thing I'm going to echo is trying to find out as much as you can about your girlfriend's tastes. I've been able to pick up things through subtle comments or questions, like her size, that I should use white gold and that she likes solitaires. The work was almost done for me.

Its kind of funny, I've definitely noticed her dropping "subtle" hints as to what she likes. I don't know how I'll pry her ring size out of her though without being pretty transparent, so I may have to ask her best friend and hope she can keep a secret.

[BrewersSuperCollector]

I would also buy, if you have the money, an anniversary ring right away. This way it will match the engagement and wedding rings, so you won't have a problem later.

[Mike Felder]

I'll give you another recommendation for Kessler's--they were great for me and two of my buddies. I've taken my wife's ring in to be cleaned and re-rhodiumed a few times now and it's always free. Last time, I sent my ring along to be cleaned and dipped as well and because they couldn't completely shine up mine they way that they usually do with rings (something about the hammered pattern on my band), they offered to give me a brand new ring, same style, for no charge. I passed on their offer (sentimental fool I guess, plus my wife seemed happy that I did) but I was impressed nonetheless.

[Oldcity]

I'm almost disappointed to hear that Kessler's is getting good reviews because the guy annoys me to no end in his commercials.

[trwi7]

I'm almost disappointed to hear that Kessler's is getting good reviews because the guy annoys me to no end in his commercials.

Not as annoying as those "He went to Jared!" commercials.

[hawing]

The Kessler's voice just sounds super smarmy to me. However, even before this thread existed, I've heard of good experiences at the place.

 

And trwi7 has a very good point: possibly no jewelry commercials are as bad as those for Jared. Though in the Madison area, Chalmers is up there on the annoyance scale. Every time Scott Chalmers says "It means more if it's from Chalmers," I want to say back to the radio, "of course it does - to YOU."

[MJLiverock]

I would check out Goodman's on State Street if you are in the Madison area. They have been around for ever and have a great reputation. They treated me and my wife great, working to design the wedding band around her engagement ring and did a great job setting the loose diamond I bought from them. They clean her rings and polish them up everytime we stop in while wandering on State Street.

 

A few different girls I dated in college swore by Goodmans and I learned a rule from the daughter of a diamond wholesaler I used to date. He told me to look for the jewelry stores that are authorized Rolex dealers. He said Rolex has very high standards on who they deal with and if they have done the work on the store you can be sure they are pretty good jewelry store.

 

I had one friend who bought his diamond from Bluenile.com and said it went pretty smooth. I know he bought at least an $8000-$10000 diamond and trusted the online store for it. I compared the cut and color and size for the one I bought at Goodmans vs. Bluenile and it was about 20% cheaper but I didn't really have buyers remorse since I liked going in and seeing the diamond in person under the microscope, picking out the setting and knowing I can stop in anytime and they take care of me.

 

I would recommend spending more for the color and clarity than the size. Some guys go all out on getting a huge stone but then skimp on the quality of the diamond so it just doesn't sparkle or look good. It is just my opinion but those huge stones with bad color and clarity just look tacky like the buyer is trying to show off by going big but ends up making it look cheap and dull.

 

Another tip with the color, if you go with yellow gold for the band it will make the diamond have a little more of a gold hue than say platinum or white gold. I ended up buying a yellow gold band but the color of the stone was very clear so I didn't have much affect from the yellow metal.

 

Good luck.

[Flying Dutchman]

One thing I would recommend is talking it through with her first. Find out what price-point she's comfortable with. My fiancée didn't want anything expensive for a couple of reasons. First off she doesn't like diamonds. Secondly anything over $200 we wanted to go into our "we want to buy a house" fund. If she wants a ring with a diamond that's great but find out if that's what is important to you guys and work through those issues. The ring I purchased is white gold with a tanzanite stone (because purple is her favorite color). She loves it, it set me back very little and we're thrilled. This isn't for everyone, but before you go purchase a ring talk these things through (if you haven't already).

[bbrauch2000]

Whatever you do, just make sure you pay attention when she's dropping the hints she's giving. I proposed earlier this year and let my fiance pick out her ring after the initial proposal (just gave a place holder ring first) and what she picked out wouldnt have been within a stone's throw of what I would have guessed. It turns out there are a zillion things girls like that don't even enter a guy's vocabulary. I didn't even know what a claddagh ring was

[And That]

My fiancée didn't want anything expensive for a couple of reasons. First off she doesn't like diamonds. Secondly anything over $200 we wanted to go into our "we want to buy a house" fund.

Same here. We bought the ring together before I officially asked her. She hates diamonds, loves blue things, and we ended up getting a sapphire (with a couple diamond accompaniments) for well under $1000. We're buying a house this summer and getting married this winter, so we have enough expenses without having $2-4K worth of jewels on her finger.

 

I understand the urge/need to go for something more, and if you don't talk about the ring ahead of time, you definitely don't want to undershoot on it.

[logan82]

Considering the expense, you might want to give her a proxy ring when you propose and then go pick it out together. I understand then need/desire to surprise the person you are proposing to, but I always felt that by the time most people usually propose they both know it is going to happen.

[Team Canada]

I'm not entirely a sentimental fool, but that said, unless she's still going to be glad in 20 years that you spent $4000 on a ring, spend much less and use the money on the honeymoon or house or whatever. The success of De Beers' advertising job 50 years ago is absolutely amazing.

[SenatorShriv]

Do you feel like you need to get a diamond? There are a lot of really cool rings out there that you can purchase on a significantly smaller budget. My girlfriend and I are personally not fans of the diamond industry and the chaos it has caused in Africa. I was really glad when one day after a Jared commercial she announced that she would kill me if I ever gave her a diamond. If you decide to go with a different type of stone there are some really great local shops in the madison area and most of the "diamond" stores will have some other cool options for you.

[AmyintheSouth]

I once read that you can take an imprint of a ring she already has in a bar of soap and bring that to the jeweler if you want to be stealthy about getting her size. Though tracing the inside on a sheet of paper makes as much sense and you wouldn't have to try to get soap off the ring. Or borrowing it for an afternoon if she won't miss it.

 

Anyhow, every woman's opinion varies on this matter of course, but if my soon-to-be fiance was finishing up school and contemplating proposing to me at the same time, I'd much prefer a ring on the inexpensive side -- still nice, but something that wouldn't cause additional stress to student loans and gaining employment. Granted, there are plenty of perfectly wonderful women who love flashier jewelry, but there's always the possibility of an upgrade once you both are settled.

 

Good luck!

[nodakfan17]

Congrats and best of luck to you on your search. I think I can provide a few tips that no one else has mentioned.

 

1- If your girlfriend has a sister, it may be worth checking in with her before you shop. Sisters (or even close friends) may know your girlfriend's tastes well. Older sisters can be especially helpful if they are married or engaged because they have been through the ring shopping process before.

 

2- Jewelry store prices are negotiable. The price shown in the display case is inflated to account for a sales commission. Some sales associates are willing to forgo a portion of their commission in order to make a sale. For example, say a particular ring costs $1000 and comes with a $200 commission for the sales associate who sells the ring. An offer of $900 would be mutually beneficial for you and the associate because you save $100 and they make $100 (since they would earn nothing if you did not purchase the ring). I was able to knock 20% off the display price of an engagement ring by simply asking the sales associate to lower the price.

[Invader3K]

Yeah, I agree. Get her a nice ring, but don't go overboard and put yourself into serious debt early on in life.