Random Advice Thread

[sbrylski]

Don't throw the trash bag at the garbage can no-look behind-the-back when there is a pitchfork around.

 

Got any good advice?

[Marleyboo]

Never try to jump on a wet board trying to break it in half with both feet.

Just trust me.

[GAME05]

it is easier to catch a baseball with a glove than with your face.

[brewerjamie15]

Chewing aluminum foil does -not- get better television reception. I don't care what my mother says.

[InsomniacInkRoss]

If you dont pay your phone bill for 2 or 3 months, they will turn it right off.

[theavrock]

That whole drinking a gallon of milk thing in an hour. It's not an urban myth. Can't be done. Trust me on this one.

[brewerjamie15]

Snakes can not do the cha-cha, so don't even bother to ask one to dance with you.

[GAME05]

if you're going #2 in the woods, it is most effective to face downhill. it's just the way your body works or something.

[Fatter than Joey]

Never give hookers your credit card!!

[Crazyk1294]

Never give hookers your credit card!!

 

True 'dat, brother.

 

Also, I recommend at least a serving of raw spinach a day.

[hawing]

If you borrow a library book, and your friend's dog destroys it, own up to the damage and your responsibility for it. Don't just put the book remains in a Ziploc bag and put said bag in a book return, apparently hoping no one will notice or connect the transaction to you.

 

After you get a bill (because the library did notice and did connect the transaction to you), don't act like it's not your problem because it was your friend's dog, and the friend is now out of the country. It will not get you off the hook.

[Brewtacular]

Your ole man was right. It was you that was wrong.

[zingsheim]

Don't put it out with your boots Ted!!

[InsomniacInkRoss]

Those pizza rolls are still really hot dude.

[trwi7]

When punching walls make sure your hand or the wall is properly padded or be prepared to have an injured hand.

[GAME05]

chicks be crazy.

[JimH5]

If you like eggwhites, like I do, don't throw the yolks into the garbage without verifying that the garbage bag is without holes. Egg yolks will indeed find there way to the bottom of your holey bag and drip into your garbage can. That happened to me twice this past week, as I was using the plastic grocery bags to line my small kitchen trash bucket.

[GAME05]

avoid staring directly at the exposed undies of the girl sitting right next to you in the bar. i learned that one last night.

 

one dude next to me asked me if he seemed sober enough to drive home. he seemed ok, but i have him this good advice: "if you have to ask, you're probably not ok." Happily, he stayed another 45 minutes drinking water and eating food.

[ttsather]

Those pizza rolls are still really hot dude.

Good advice. *thumbs up*

[twobrewers]

That whole drinking a gallon of milk thing in an hour. It's not an urban myth. Can't be done. Trust me on this one.

I've witnessed it first hand. It can be done. But that guy was very big. (And still was not having fun)

 

Your ole man was right. It was you that was wrong.

If you are under 25, there is a very good chance you are an idiot. Someday you will realize this.

 

 

Don't major in marketing. Get a real degree. (Meaning, in order to do profession "X" - I need a degree in "X")

[logan82]

Never rub another man's rhubarb.

 

If you go to school for a phychology degree you should expect people to ask you "what are you going back to school for" whenever you tell them what you are majoring in.

[mothershipconnection]

As a bachelor's degree, psychology is a joke, it's a survey of survey courses that will never teach you nearly enough to do anything. You get 12 classes, each of them incompatible with eachother, and thus have 12 little tiny fragments of information. Other degrees are much more cumulative and complementary.

[logan82]

As a bachelor's degree, psychology is a joke, it's a survey of survey courses that will never teach you nearly enough to do anything. You get 12 classes, each of them incompatible with eachother, and thus have 12 little tiny fragments of information. Other degrees are much more cumulative and complementary.

Don't get me wrong, I mean no disrespect to the field of Psychology or getting a degree in it, just that every person I have ever met that has gone to school for a psychology degree, has gone back for something else. At the very least they have gone on for a master's degree.

[mothershipconnection]

Any department worth its weight in rat dung should make it readily apparent from day one that a bachelor's degree will not be sufficient and will get you pretty much nowhere in life. I knew before I even started college that I was going to have to go on to graduate school unless I wanted to work in a group home for less than I was already making delivering pizza.

 

Our culture has convinced people that college is an integral and sufficient part of the American dream and if you get a college degree you'll be happy and have a successful career with a personal limo driver. It ain't like that, and people can't figure out why they can't land an incredible job with huge compensation with their college degree. Turns out you need a degree you can actually do something with. My employees typically have a bachelor's in psych (and we pay them little but more than competitors) and they're about the biggest malcontents you can imagine, bemoaning every little inconvenience they have to face and claiming nothing is fair. I'm sorry your friends get paid more with better benefits, they have computer science degrees and you have a BA in psych.

[Schlitz001]

.....always wear sunscreen.